Parenting
She Said What I Couldn't
The morning after my daughter's surgery, my youngest handed me an excuse. Then her sister said what I couldn't. A working mom's honest reflection on strength.
“Mommy, you have an excuse today. Your daughter just came back from hospital. You can skip office and stay home.”
That was Fa, my youngest.
It was the morning after we brought my daughter home from surgery. I was getting ready for office, and Fa looked at me like she had finally found me a way out.
And the only thing running through my head was this:
Who would I even give that excuse to?
The company doesn’t pause. The team doesn’t pause. The work doesn’t pause.
That’s just the life of an entrepreneur. You all know it.
But it hits differently when you are also a mom. When your kids need your emotional and physical presence, and the work needs you at the exact same time.
And Then Ay Spoke
Then Ay, the one who had just come home from surgery, looked at her little sibling and said something I will not forget:
“She is the CEO. She shouldn’t be giving excuses to anyone.”
She said what I couldn’t say for myself.
She had watched me through all of it. The late nights. The hard calls. The days I showed up when I didn’t want to.
And somewhere in all of that, she understood something about me that I was still figuring out in that very moment.
If she hadn’t answered, there would have been silence. Because I didn’t have the words. She did.
What I Keep Coming Back To
Here is the thing about being a working mother.
You spend so much time worrying about what your children are missing. The school events. The slow mornings. The version of you that is fully present, without one eye on your phone.
You carry the guilt quietly. The invisible kind. The kind nobody sees.
But your kids are watching more than you think.
Not just your struggles. Your strength too.
They see you get up. They see you keep your word. They see you hold the fort on the days that would have flattened most people.
My daughter handed me back my own words that morning, before I could find them myself. And I think that is what our children quietly learn from us. Not from perfect mornings. Not from the absence of struggle. From the way we carry it.
To Every Mother Building Something
If you are a mother building a company, growing in your career, or simply carrying a lot more than anyone realizes, I want you to hear this:
Your children are learning from the way you carry it.
And that is more than enough to keep going. :)
What is one thing your child has said that you couldn’t have said better yourself?
If you want to go a level deeper, American Psychological Association’s parenting resources and postpartum depression and anxiety can help.
Updated on June 16, 2026
FAQ
Frequently asked questions
How do working mothers handle the pressure to never pause, even during a family crisis?
Honestly, by accepting that the pause and the work both have to happen, just not in the way you imagined. The pressure does not disappear because your child needs you. What helps is naming it out loud, asking for the specific help you need at home and at work, and giving yourself the same permission to show up imperfectly that you would give any team member going through the same thing.
What does it mean to lead by example as a working parent or entrepreneur?
It is not about a perfect schedule or a polished version of you. It is about showing your children that you keep your word, that you finish what you start, and that you carry hard days without pretending they are easy. Children read your behaviour long before they read your advice. When you lead like that at home, you do not have to explain it. They notice.
What do children absorb from watching a parent build something?
More than we think. They see the late nights, the difficult calls, the days you would rather not get up but do. They also see how you treat people, how you handle setbacks, and how you talk about your own work. Over time, that becomes their idea of what it means to take something seriously and stay with it, even when it is hard.
How do you balance being a CEO and being present for your family?
I have stopped trying to balance in the perfect sense and started trying to be honest about each day. Some days the company gets more of me, some days my kids do. What I protect is the small, regular time with each child, the conversations after a hard day, and the moments where they need me to be a parent and not an executive. Presence does not have to be constant to count.
